Finding My Way To Love

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Preparing Yet Again

Every year thirty two NFL teams prepare for playing in and winning the Super Bowl. All players on every team have dreams of holding that beautiful Vince Lombardi trophy in their hands, while wearing a Super Bowl Championship hat on their head, and sizing their finger for the championship ring . They envision the city in which they play for having a huge parade in their honor and kissing and hugging their families as a sign of appreciation for their support. The regular season starts, and games are played. The teams with the fewest wins(unless you're the Seattle Seahawks) super bowl dreams quickly come to an end. The teams with most wins go on to play playoff games keeping their hope alive. One by one teams hope are destroyed by loses , leaving only two of the thirty two teams hopeful for a Super Bowl win. One team will see their dream come true while the other team joins the rest of the losing teams with hopes and dreams of winning next year's Super Bowl.

Last year around this time I promised myself that by February 14th (then 2010) I was going to meet my husband. Sadly to say the only thing I meet where a few “All Star” hang overs and a guy that was a sophomore in college(looking younger than I am can be a blessing and a curse at Al though I didn't meet my true love last year I have given up hope.

For the New Year I made a vision board for myself. On one side of my vision board, I have visualized myself singing and acting winning awards and what not's and on the other side is me visualizing myself for this year, in a serious relationship with my dream lover. I am believing for this relationship to evolve sooner than later because by faith I have spoken my wedding date into existence ( March 3, 2012). With two visions for one year I've started doing preparation for both. I'm pretty much prepared for the entertainment thing to jump off, but a little rusty on relationship stuff. Therefore I'm using my nanny job as a way to give me some practice. I'm cooking, cleaning, and helping with two small children. I must say I've learned a lot in the few weeks I've been doing this. For example : when having children I will make sure my first child is potty trained, changing a two year old shitty diaper and two month old shitty diaper is just too much shit for one person to handle (lol). I will never breast feed not matter how healthy it is for a kid. The only time I want my nipples sucked is during four play (lol). Any one who knows me knows that I have a habit of biting my nails. I want a nice ring and a nice ring on a hand of bitten nails is not a nice look at all. So now I get my nails done (I have the cut really short, so I wont look like ghetto Sha Sha from the boogie down I also talk more to my married friends(I only have one, but we talk a lot and she gives me advise).Being with the love my life is important to me and whatever I can do to open myself up to the possibility of actually being with my dream lover I'm willing to do it. So I'm taking a stand!!!, and saying good by to the one night stands (I've only had one) and quick fixes with old acquaintances.(including the Titan). I'm starting fresh and it feels great. Lastly I've been putting together a book of all that I want for my wedding day ( no worries I haven't put a deposit down on a locations) the book only has my color scheme, my dress, shoes, the names of my brides maids, maid and matron of honor. Little by little its coming together. Spiritually I pray and meditate, not for my husband to come but more so for balance and developing a relationship with God. I am a firm believer that God can't just part of my life but more so in my life if I am going to be the best wife, mother, friend, sister, actress, singer, or even daughter that I want to be. Lastly fly, not like stripper club “you want to see my ass, then let me see some cast...make rain” but more Michelle Obama fly soft and elegant, topping off every outfit with my one of a kind “Lola” personality.

The year before didn't work out so well for me but neither did it work out well with thirty one teams without a super bowl championship. Just like those teams that luck out this year and year before, I will prepare yet again for what I want. Thankfully I don't have to go through 16 games of tackling at the line of scrimmage (lol). I'm not giving up.

To my single friend that has high hopes just as I do, don't worry he's coming, just do your part and prepare. When he shows up and the wedding date is set, invite me so I can say: See dreams lovers are really true.

Till Next Time
Simply Lola

1 comment:

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