Finding My Way To Love

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Going Unnoticed


Going Unnoticed
Due to some very expensive car issues I have found myself back on the bus (tragedy). In as much as I hate being back on the bus it feels good to know that (Karen) the morning bus driver is glad to see me, and Stanly the afternoon bus driver finds my smile refreshing. I now have a temp assignment at match.com and without being on their dating site I managed to land two dates last week. I’m thinking it’s my auar from match that made a few good matches for me (I know, corny…lol). I had stopped agreeing to go on dates for a while because I found it very embarrassing to say well I don’t have a car can you pick me up, and if the guy picks me up for a date and it begins to take a turn for the worse, there’s nowhere to run. I’m sure I could jump up from the table while having dinner and just run out the restaurant screaming he’s crazy, he’s crazy but no matter how weird or freakish I may think my date is I would still be the crazy woman that ran out the restaurant(not a very good lasting impression to leave on the first date). Anyway the first guy was short, nice hair and about 5 years older than me. We hookup after work for dinner and had a few drinks. We talked for about three hours, and yes we talked (we both had a fair share of conversation to exchange). We didn’t have much in common but we compared notes with our dislike and likes of what neither one of us knew about. I left with my belly full and my body a tad bit tipsy but very clear that I was onto the next. Bachelor #2 was cool I had more in common with him. He was much taller, but no spark( I know the author of “He’s Just Not That Into You” say men invented the “spark” )but I never had a desire to see his paint brush or show him my canvas(lol). I guess it was poor play execution of the “spark”. I’m not sure why, Daylon said it’s my shallow side taking over, but what does he know, I have one dream about Terrance Newman and now I’m considered only liking the bold, black and handsome guy…ok so maybe that’s true …don’t judge me  . Bachelor #2 and I saw “Social Network” and agreed to disagree on our conclusions of the movie. He felt the main character (Facebook Inventor) was arrogant and I felt like he was very good at figuring out a way to no longer be in this world unnoticed. Now after many lawsuits and broken friendships I’m sure he didn’t realize the sacrifice was one that would make him out to be a young wealthy asshole who still struggles with getting laid. Never the less both guys are good guys and are making great friends.

My friends Reggie and Daylon are always saying how I need more friends and I should be proactive about meeting people. Well I took their advice and found some new friends who love to sing and think I am absolutely the cutest thing they’ve ever met. However they have no desire to conform to the likeness of my canvas. My new hanging buddies are three fun feisty gay men. My friend Kim ( who introduced me to the trio) and I met up with them at this new place called Buttons in Addison and listened to live music and criticized the poor unfortunate souls with bad weaves and wardrobes. While we were listening to the sounds of the untitled band I remember running into a few people I knew and them asking me would I be singing that night. With disappointment on their faces and frustration in my heart as I told them no I started to feel annoyed and question when will the day come that I am no longer unnoticed. Before I could become emotionally involved in my thoughts one of my new fabulous friends said something funny about a dreadful un be weaveable situation. Later that night while I was getting ready for bed I realized that there was no reason to be frustrated about not having the attention I so desired because the next morning at 7:30am there were going to be at least twenty people just waiting to hear me sing and my cousin Joanne will be there encouraging me with every smile.

In this life we all want more. We want to be recognized for who we are and what we do. There are days that seem like we are all alone and all that we’ve strived for is in vain. Sometimes we have to stop thinking about what we don’t have and realize just what we do have. In as much as I want to be noticed by Terrance Newman and Warner Brother Records I am thankful that I have been recognized by few good men, faithful members of my dad’s church and my big cousin Joanne Thompson.

So to my friend who has yet to be noticed by the man of your dreams and properly promoted to the position that you desire, don’t dwell on who hasn’t recognized you but appreciated the few good people that have manage to notice just who are and what you have to offer, loving every bit of you.

Til Next Time
Simply Lola

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