Finding My Way To Love

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Fornication Confessions

It has gotten to be a routine for my friends to call me with a disclaimer stating that whatever we talk about is between us and they don’t want to see our discussion in my next blog (lol). As a friend I would never tell the world my friends fornication confessions. I would never say anything about my friends new boyfriend’s paint brush curves to the right a little (he’s got the hook) or that one of them had a blind date who turns out to be a professional stalker. I would never tell anyone about the freaky role playing my friend enjoys with her “secret lover”. I pride myself in being a good friend and would never share my friends fornication confessions, their secret are totally safe with me (lol)

Confessions are private thoughts that for some reason haunt us until we break down and tell someone we can trust and wont judge us. Catholics confide in priests and my friends confide in me. As for me I make my confessions to my sister. My sister was without a phone this week and that left me traumatized. What was I going to do!?!? Who else was I going to talk to about my colorless life. With my sister not having a phone and my friends working real jobs (the type of jobs that require you to produce work) I had no other choice but to …BLOG.

Stress has gotten the best of me. So much is going in my life. My nanny gig will be over sooner, much sooner than I expected and I have to find a place to live. Which means I have got to get another job because I only work part time at Barneys New York Co-OP ( I’ll be damn to let go of that job) and I have to find a place to stay within three weeks ( anyone know someone with a room for rent). Not only that but I have to find a place that has good access to the bus and train station, because with my nanny job being over I have to leave the car with the family. With my life changing drastically I find myself wanting to just run away, not just run away but run away in the arms of a strong, sexy, black ( not blue black, just black) man. Yall know how I love a big guys, like Tommie Harris (is he single). At this very moment one can say I am on edge and would like to relieve the stress of my world through coloring. As a woman with morals I am not suppose to say this. I am suppose to go to church, and pray. But even a woman with morals wants to have a hoe moment. A moment where she can color without being self conscious or worried about being noted or judge from a Strawberry letter on the Steve Harvey Morning Show. You can say what you want but women with morals we’re a little jealous of hoes/groupies. I mean hoes/groupies not only get to cum while coloring but they gets paid for it. Ok some will call their life style prostitution but I call it smart. Let me be real; there have been times were I just wished I could have told a brotha to pay me for his poor performance.

One may ask so why don't I just go flirt with the first fine man that approaches me and get on!?!?Well to answer the question it has crossed my mind but the chances of it being worth a good joy ride are 50/50. It's clear my painter would be a liberating moment (one night stand. Either way if its good I will only escape my life just for a few hours, if its bad i will only want to take his life in less than an hour (lol). In as much as I want to feel the deep strokes of a masculine man paintbrush stroking deep strokes one after another (lol)I just need to relax, have a glass of wine go to sleep and activate the words of my friend Omari, just embrace my struggle(lol).

To my friend who had found herself in a bind and just wants to conform to the ways of coloring with a liberating moment. Trust me I am there with you, but if we surrender to our emotions we'll kick ourselves in the morning. So embrace your struggle enjoy a glass of wine. If nothing else you’ll have a good night sleep, waking up focusing on what’s important.(lol)

Til Next Time
Simply Lola


Anonymous said...

Love it tisa / kiki

Anonymous said...

I have been going through the non coloring stage for 3 years. It is hard, really hard especially when all you see is love birds lol. Oh well life still goes on and everybody has there time. Our time will come soon! (fingers crossed)!!